Relationship Advice
It's up to you who you fancy. When you're growing up, it's entirely normal to have crushes on all kinds of people, including people of the same sex. If you do, it doesn't necessarily mean you're gay.
When it comes to relationships, there's no right and wrong. Everyone has the right to be with someone they like - whether it's a boy or a girl. And if your choice of partner isn't the same as your mates it really shouldn't matter.
Talking about your feelings with friends can be very hard. You might be scared they won't understand and mock you. Sometimes its easier to talk to someone you don't know. There are all kinds of places you can visit in Sunderland for confidential advice or even a chat. Check out the links page for further information.
Males are often blamed for not taking into account the females feelings over having sex for the first time, so let's have a look from a women's point of view:
Sex, what do girls think about it?
Having sex for the first time is a big deal for both of you. Here are some things that your girlfriend might be thinking about.
Feel the love
Most girls want their first time to be with someone they love, care about and trust. They want to take things slowly and develop a really close bond before they get physical. Don't pressure her into having sex until she she's ready and always take her feelings into account. She'll love you all the more for your thoughtfulness.
Getting Naked
Being naked for the first time in front of someone you really, really like is a scary thing for lots of girls. They're worried about what you will think when you see them with no clothes on. If you think she looks beautiful - tell her!
Fear of Pregnancy
Most girls under 18 don't want to get pregnant. Carrying a condom will probably make you more attractive to the opposite sex! That'll be because it shows respect, that your not taking anything for granted and that you're a responsible kind of lad.
That condom moment
Lots of girls worry about how to put condoms on and will be delighted if you know how to do it. Do yourself a favour - take a few minutes to get some practice in and get putting a condom on down to a fine art.
Foreplay
Sex is often a very emotional experience for a girl. She wants to feel loved and respected and know the boy she is with cares about whether she's enjoying it or not. Take the time to ask your girlfriend what she likes. Spend time kissing and cuddling and don't rush into anything until you are both ready.
Remember, practice safe sex!
Safe sex means making sure you don't catch a sexually transmitted infection. Your best protection is to use a condom. Not just sometimes, but every time you have sex. Because some infections have no obvious symptoms, you can never know for sure if the person you are sleeping with has an STI. Using a condom won't spoil your fun, and it could save your life.
Pressure
Saying no can seem like the most difficult decision in the world. Will they think you're a baby? Dump you? Spread nasty rumours? If you're with someone who really cares about you, they'll happily wait until you are ready. If they won't, you're probably better off without them.
It wont always be the girl saying no - do not be frightened to do so.
Some really good examples of different relationship scenarios are available at RUthinking.co.uk:
